Monday, September 04, 2006

Week of drama

Every Wednesday night at 9:00, Mom, Fatty Catty and I watch Laguna Beach. We like to see the awesome catfights. And then we usually get into one ourselves. This week has been punctuated by 1. Me and Fatty fighting like a couple of rabid beasts 2. Mom and the Kaiser fighting 3. Me and Fatty fighting again.

Day 1: Mom and the Kaiser come home from an errand to find piles of fur, both black and orange, all over the floor. We seriously tied up. I won, of course.

Day 2: Mom comes home and finds her latest shoe order. She is so hung up on getting her stilettos unpacked, that she puts a package of Pizza Hut hot wings in the microwave to reheat. She forgets that there is foil in the box, and she catches the microwave on fire. This is all within five minutes of her getting home. So she hastily pulls out the flaming box and tosses it out in the yard.

Day 3: The Kaiser rolls up a newspaper and whacks Mom with it because she has obsessive compulsive disorder.

Day 4: Mom takes her shoe off and whacks the Kaiser with it repeatedly because he’s nagging her, and doesn’t recognize her supreme princess authority.

Day 5: More catfights. Kaiser says the three of us are shortening his life span.

Day 6: I have one of my howling Meezer freakouts.

Day 7: Mom is scared to death when she’s on the litter box, and hears something stirring in the shower. Is it Psycho???? No, it’s just Fatty sleeping in the tub

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