Feline Prison Blues

Saturday Mom dumped me off at Camp Cupcake Kitty Prison, also known as Countryside Pet Resort. Now I know how Martha Stewart felt. I howled all the way to Andover. I finally quit howling Monday morning at 9:00 a.m. I admit that I like the kitty play room with the aquarium, but I would stillrather be at the casa. Mom says there are maintenance guys working on the apartment this week, and she doesn't want me to bite them again. I'm already trying to engineer a prison break. I've been slipping notes to the kitties on my cellblock, including a big fluffy gray Persian named Conan. However, I can't seem to motivate him to help me. All he does is sleep and lick himself. I've tried howling and poking him, but he just lays there like a big bump on a log. What is with these other cats? Don't they want to be free? The rest have elected me leader of their prison gang. I'm gnawing one of the bars of my cage into a shank right now, so I better go.